fairs and naps.

yesterday was a strange day for me. I went to the festival and on the way there i was having a grand ol' time, but i was having a few blonde moments, like when i loaned eli my keys so he could use the screwdriver for his hearing aids, and when he was done he handed them back but i had forgotten i had given them to him, so i said, "oh thanks! where did you find these?" and than was like, "oh, i gave them to you didn't i?" hehe, and also my glasses cleaner case somehow got stuck to my sleeve and i saw it and i was like, "ewww!" and threw it down, but then realized, oh wait that's mine! so i tried for a minute to pick it up and finally got it. I have really short arms. so anyways we get to the festival and for some reason right after we get there, i want to go home, cause i got really tired and kinda bored even though it was fun. for some reason nothing was was entertaining to me. You know how you have those days where no matter how fun and exciting the day is, you just want to go home and sleep? i was having one of those days. i finally decided that i was probably just hungry, but when we ate, i couldn't finish my fries, and that never happens. I got chicken that tasted like fish so that was a downer too. plus the food section we were in didn't have the bread bowls and i really wanted one of those but i couldn't. what finally went right was when i got a slushie orange thing. that was so good. :) the jousting was kinda fun too. although the knight who we were supposed to be cheering for was a bad guy so i decided to cheer for the good guy with the nice hair. Christina looked at me like i was weird for doing so, but i didn't care, and i was right. he won. i mean who couldn't with the perfect hair he had. I was kinda jealous of it, wishing i had his hair. But finally we got to go home, and i tried to get people to race back to the car, but no one did, so i just did it, but while i was doing so, some guy drove by and yelled, "run, witch" which isn't nice. because i'm not a witch. oh well. but i had a nice nap when i got back in the car and realized when i got home, i actually had a great time, and all i really had needed was a nap. so sorry for being grumpy.  i really need to sleep now, it's midnight which is like 2 hours past my bed time, and when it gets that late,  i start rambling on and on and on and start saying loopy things....heheh.. looopy...ok i'm loopy. mmmhhhhmmm, bacon. :)

internet mission

so lately my internet has been acting like it has a mind of its own and has decided to act up and only cooperate when it wants to. I had been using safari, and it was working fantastic. high speeds and quick browsing. But alas it decided it didn't want to friends anymore and started acting like a frenemy to me. I tried everything to win it's complete loyalty back. I deleted cookies and history, did system clean-ups, but it was like nope not going to be your friend. So i sadly decided it was time to call it quits and cut the cord. If it wouldn't play nice, neither would I. so i killed it. I extracted it from my computer and got rid of it. So i decided to give firefox and internet explorer another chance, but they were worse to me. i think they remembered how i kept getting rid of them too. and they wouldn't take me back. they were just painfully slow. so i searched online, "fastest internet explorer" and the top result was Opera. I had never heard of this guy before, but i read reviews and he seemed like a nice choice so i picked him. I downloaded it and at first it was slow, so i decided to restart my computer, and viola! its pretty fast and i'm happy with my new friend. Unless he decides to betray me sometime down the road. But until that day comes, i'll just have to stick with him. :)

painting

                                                   I think I got more paint on me than the wall.. haha oh well

Last night me my friends Marissa, Ellie, Jill, and Dustin went to our friends Allie and Adam's house to paint and it was great fun. we started off by eating delicious lasagna, salad and cookies, and then went on to paint. we painted green and tan. very beautiful colors. their house is going to look fantastic. Well anyways i was doing so good at not getting any paint on me when ellie and i got into a paint war. needless to say, she won, and i got paint on my pants, shirt, face, and arms. after painting she tried getting me to get her back, but i didn't want to  give her the satisfaction, so I said something like, "i'm not going to put pants on her...." meaning to say, "im not going to put paint on her pants. (yeah i can't really talk) and it just made Ellie and me burst out laughing so hard and we couldn't stop. I think we were laughing for 15-20 min straight and no matter what anyone said we couldn't stop. we just kept laughing more and more. It was so fun because i have not laughed that hard in ages and if felt so good to be that happy.
moving on, today i went to the orthodontist office and they decided i needed braces (which I do) so i'll be getting those on march 1st. I'm both reluctant and excited, because i'll have a ton of metal in my mouth making me look geekier then ever but it will really help my teeth. :) i guess we'll see how it works out.

valentines day

the wind howls giving warning to the storm coming to rage its fury against the earth. I ponder as the rain pours down what it represents, and i come to this conclusion. It represents all the singles alone and sad on this day of love. This day is all about love and romance and everywhere they go it's shoved into their faces that another year goes by without a special someone. and the clouds are expressing their pity by crying on earth for us. I must admit i've had those years, those years of depression where yet another year goes by and i'm still alone. where i wonder, is it me? Am i doing something wrong? why am i always so alone.
But this year its different. Yes i still don't have anyone, but this time i don't care. I know a man will not complete me. I realize that all i really need is Jesus and he will give me every I need. He has given me everything I need. I don't need to be dependent on anyone else but Him. and I feel content and peaceful about it. would it be nice to have someone who loves you in romantic way? sure, but i will wait for Gods timing and until it happens i'm going to live my life with joy! :) So Happy Valentines day everyone!!

EMCEE

So tonight was coffee house, and instead of sitting there just listening to the bands, I decided i'd help out in the kitchen. It was very fun. I made a few frappuccinos which i haven't done since my starbucks days but it was easy to pick up. I think having experience really helped me pick it up. But only after like a half hour of doing that without thinking i decided to emcee instead because our original emcee had to take his wife to the hospital. Please pray for them by the way. She's 9 months pregnant and she was having difficulty breathing. So please pray that God will take care of them, which I know He will do, but I think he likes us to ask anyways.
So anyways I jumped in to do emcee. I don't know why I volunteered because I hate talking in front of people, especially people i don't know. But it actually wasn't so bad. there weren't a lot of people there tonight so i think that helped a little bit. And surprisingly i wasn't nervous. I messed up a few times, but who doesn't? and it was actually pretty fun. and it worked out perfectly cause they didn't need me in the kitchen and i still got to help out. It was weird, because this was the very last coffeehouse that Jill and Dustin will still be single. The next coffee house, they'll be MARRIED! so weird. But don't get me wrong, I'm extremely happy and excited for them and I CANNOT wait until they do get married! :)  Ok I'm super sleepy, so i'm going to go to sleep now. :)

one thing

one thing people really need to know about me is i tend to keep people at an arms length. I don't mean to but I think i do it cause i don't want to get hurt. It's hard opening up and letting people know all of you. that's why i created this blog, because it's easier to express myself in writing than it is in person. That and also when i'm with people i get all confused and tongue tied when trying to talk about whats going on with my life, and it's so easy to do it on paper. if that makes sense. its like i can't really put into words what i'm trying to say and my brain and mouth don't really coordinate well, but my brain and hands do, if that makes sense.
so i was reading in mark today and realized the author say immediately so many times. maybe its just the translation but i never noticed how many times he said  it. check it out.

the danger of what-ifs

so I was at work daydreaming, which i do very often because i'm back there all by my self and my mind started wondering to what ifs. What if i won the lottery, what if i were born in a rich family, what if i had a better job? than i was thinking, what if i hadn't been born into a christian family, what if i was from a country where i wasn't able to worship God freely, what if i had no friends? Then I thought, i should be thankful for what God gave me and not take him for granted. He gave me a roof over my head, a good job, amazing friends and family, and Jesus in my life, and freedom to worship Him freely and spend as much time with Him as I want. But why is it, when we able to do that, we neglect Him, and only call on Him when we are going through harder times? He calls us to worship Him and follow Him with all of our hearts, but do we do that? No. it's only half-heartedly or only sometimes. I know because I am going through that too. But everyday i'm working on making my relationship with Him better. It will take time but i'm willing to strive for that deep relationship with God. I've fallen out of the habbit of reading my bible everyday but i'm working on getting better at reading it every night before going to bed. God is so good, and so patient with me. He will always be there for us no matter what happens.